Screen Time is genuinely capable and genuinely badly signposted. Six steps, and the one that matters most is the passcode: set it wrong and everything after it is decoration.

Almost every complaint about Screen Time traces back to one of two things: the passcode was the same as the phone’s unlock code, or the device was never marked as a child’s in the first place. Both are fixed in the first two steps below, and neither is obvious from the menus.

Before you start

Have the device in your hands and your child already in your family group, since Screen Time cannot restrict a person it does not know about. Decide the passcode before you start, and make it one your child has never seen you type on that phone.

The 6 steps

Open Screen Time for the right person

Open the Settings app, scroll down and tap Screen Time. Under Family, tap your child’s name. If the child does not appear there, they are not in your family group yet and that is the first thing to fix, because restrictions attach to the person, not the handset.

Set a Screen Time passcode that is not the unlock code

Set the passcode before anything else, and make it different from the code your child uses to unlock the phone. A shared code is the single most common reason a careful setup quietly stops working, because it takes one glance over a shoulder to undo.

Turn on Content & Privacy Restrictions

Tap Content & Privacy Restrictions, enter the Screen Time passcode if asked, then switch Content & Privacy Restrictions on. Nothing below this switch takes effect until it is on, which catches a lot of people out.

Deal with purchases and installs

Tap iTunes & App Store Purchases to decide whether the child can install, delete or buy anything. Requiring approval for installs is more useful than blocking them outright: it turns every new app into a short conversation instead of a fight.

Set content ratings and web filtering

Tap App Store, Media, Web & Games for age ratings on apps, films and music, then Web Content inside it to limit adult websites or restrict browsing to an approved list. The same screen holds the Game Center settings further down, which is where multiplayer and friend-adding live.

Restrict who can be contacted

Use the communication settings to decide who your child can reach and be reached by, and review the privacy entries under Privacy, location sharing in particular. This is the half of Screen Time people skip, and it is the half that matters when something goes wrong.

The passcode is the whole system

Screen Time is not a filter that runs beneath the operating system; it is a set of switches held shut by a four-digit code. If the code is known, every switch is available, and a child who wants an app back will find that out within a week.

So: set it privately, make it different from the unlock code, and store it somewhere you will still have it in a year. Apple can help you reset it through the Apple Account attached to the device, but that route is slow and needs the account credentials to hand.

Approval requests beat outright blocks

The strongest configuration for a child between about eight and thirteen is not the most restrictive one. Allow installs but require approval, and every request becomes a thirty-second exchange about what the app is and who else uses it.

The alternative, a blanket block, teaches nothing and pushes the interest sideways onto a friend’s device, which you do not configure. The same reasoning runs through the ten house rules: a rule that gets discussed survives, a rule that gets imposed gets routed around.

What to set, by age

Under eight: strict content ratings, no installs, no browser or an approved-sites-only browser, communication limited to a named list. At that age the phone is a camera and a way to call you.

Eight to twelve: installs by approval, content ratings at their age band, web content limited, and Game Center friend-adding off. This is the band where the settings do the most work.

Thirteen and up: ratings loosen, purchases stay locked to approval, and the useful controls become downtime and app limits instead of content restrictions. Expect to renegotiate, not tighten.

When the menu on your screen does not match

Apple moves items inside Screen Time between iOS versions, and the sub-menus in particular get renamed. Compare the date above with the iOS version on the device: if the phone is newer, trust the screen and tell us which label changed.

If the child’s name is missing under Family, they have not been added to the family group; no restriction can be set until they are.
If a restriction appears set but has no effect, check that the master Content & Privacy Restrictions switch is on; the sub-settings retain their values while the parent switch is off.

Questions about iPhone & iPad parental controls

Does Screen Time work if the child has their own Apple Account?

Yes, and that is the arrangement it is designed for. The child’s account sits inside your family group and you manage their Screen Time from your own device. A child using an adult account on a hand-me-down phone is the case that does not work properly.

Can my child delete the Screen Time settings?

Not without the passcode. They can, however, delete an app and reinstall it to reset its usage counter, and they can change the device time in some configurations. Requiring approval for installs closes the first of those.

Do app limits stop games completely?

No, they stop them after the allowance is used. A child can ask for more time, and you can grant fifteen minutes from your own phone. That request-and-grant loop is more workable day to day than a hard block.

What about the browser?

Web content filtering applies to Safari and to apps that use the system browser. A separately installed browser can sidestep it, which is why the installs setting and the web filter belong to one job, not two.

Is a third-party app better than Screen Time?

Usually not on iPhone, because the operating system limits what any other app is allowed to see and do. The built-in controls have deeper access than anything you can install, and they cost nothing.

My child uses an iPad for school. Does this break it?

It should not, if the school apps are already installed and you set limits by app instead of by category. Add the school apps to the always-allowed list so a downtime schedule does not lock a homework tool at nine in the evening.

Sources

Apple Support: use parental controls on your child's iPhone or iPad · checked 2026-09-02

iPhone and iPad parental controls: Screen Time, set up properly